New Truck

One day, Jim Bob was walking down Main Street when he saw his buddy Bubba driving a brand new pickup.
Bubba pulled up to him with a wide grin.
“Bubba, where’d you git that truck?!?”
“Tammie Joe’ gived it to me,” Bubba replied.
“She gaved it to ya?
I know’d she wuz kinda sweet on ya’ll but a new truck?”
“Well, Jim Bob’ let me tell you wut’ happened. We wuz drivin’ out on County Road 6, in the middle of nowheres. Tammie Joe’ pulled off the road, put the truck in 4X4 wheel drive, and headed into the woods. She parked the truck, got out, threw off all her clothes and said, ‘Bubba,ya’ll take whatever you want.’
… So I took the truck!”
“Bubba, yore a smart man! Them clothes woulda never fit you!”

Paddy phones an ambulance because his mate's been hit by a car.

Paddy: 'Get an ambulance here quick, he's bleeding from his nose and
ears and I tink both his legs are broken.'
Operator: 'What is your location sir?'
Paddy: 'Outside number 28 Eucalyptus Street ......'
Operator: 'How do you spell that sir?'
Silence.... (heavy breathing) and after a minute.
Operator: 'Are you there sir?'
More heavy breathing and another minute later.
Operator: 'Sir, can you hear me?'
This goes on for another few minutes until....
Operator: 'Sir, please answer me. Can you still hear me?'
Paddy: 'Yes, sorry about dat... I couldn't spell eucalyptus, so I just
dragged him round to number 3 Oak Street .... '

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Its not always the biggest and the bestest, its them that make the least mistakes.

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he
asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money
from you; I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was
pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the
next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for
him at his door.

Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill,
the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you; I'm doing
community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop. The
next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you'
card and a dozen doughnuts waiting for him at his door.

Then an MP came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the
barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing
community service this week.' The MP was very happy and left the shop.
The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen
MPs lined up waiting for a free haircut.

And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the
citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.

BOTH POLITICIANS AND NAPPIES NEED TO BE CHANGED OFTEN AND FOR THE SAME REASON!

If you don't forward this you have no sense of humour. Nothing bad will
happen, however, you must live with yourself knowing that laughter is
not in your future. Now send it to everyone you know..

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Its not always the biggest and the bestest, its them that make the least mistakes.

Excellent!

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Its not always the biggest and the bestest, its them that make the least mistakes.

I didn't have a lot of luck finding the picture Jim, never mind the cat

I have to agree, the link took me to my G-Mail sign in.

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Posts often deleted................Why? I don't know.

Luckily I already had the pic................

Arr, we had this one a couple of months back I believe. So, some of use should remember the location of the cat.
Maybe a memory test, are you losing or not.

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Posts often deleted................Why? I don't know.