In the first 10 days of the Olympics the Romanians have taken gold, silver, bronze, copper, lead, drain covers and anything else they can get their hands on.

Somalia has been thrown out of the Olympics. They didn't know that sailing and shooting were two separate events!

As a way of apology to North Korea for displaying the South Korean flag at the Olympic football, the team will be treated to an all you can eat buffet, at Battersea dogs home.

Is it just me or have you noticed how much these Chinese swimmers have come on since the Morecambe Bay cockle picking accident.

First sailing results are in - Britain has taken gold, the USA have taken silver and Somalia have taken a middle-aged couple from Weymouth.

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Lets be careful out there !